11/3/08

Jewced up and sloppy

Howdy Jewsters,

So Saturday I ventured out of the house for the first time in days and took in a night of Halloween-inspired bands at TT the Bears.

On the bill were Roxy Music, The Velvet Underground, Ziggy Stardust and the Spiders from Mars and New Order. Sounds like a bad version of a country-rock song, doesn't it? "If they had a glam band in heaven, what sweet music it would play..."

In truth, these were local bands posing as the above -- and all down the line they were amazing. Highlights of the night included MeAndJoanCollins lead singer Bo Berringer as Alter Cocker Indie Rocker* Lou Reed and Sidewalk Driver frontman Ted McKitterick as Ziggy Stardust, the latter performing the entirety of the Spiders from Mars album.

The show was so hot I had to remove my long black Joey Ramone wig and scarf down a few cups of beer to cool off. As a result, when I bumped into the Virgin Mary (complete with musky perfume and soulful, bee-stung-lips), I recklessly asked her how it was she'd kept her "chastity" for so long. "Like this," she said, placing the V sign around her mouth and rudely wiggling her tongue. If an equally lovely (and musky) Sacred Bleeding Heart of Jesus hadn't touched Mary tongue-to-tongue and exclaimed "oh yeah!!" I might have been tempted to give up on JewPunk altogether and head over to "the other side." As it was, I paid my tab and went back to check out New Order. Obviously, I'd been beaten to the punch by a true believer.

To conclude, great show followed by relapse into sickness followed by panicky hours of last-minute grading now.

Pax vobiscum!

Steven "King of the JewPunks" Beeber

* Alter Cocker -- Old Fart in Yiddish

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