The Professors Like My Looks

Yes, that's right. Though I may be no Thin Man, the academically inclined of Germany are planning to meet in April to talk about my book. Will they invite lepers and crooks? And have they read all Fitzgerald's works? I don't know, but I'm pleased as punch, regardless. Bob Dylan eat your heart out

http://www.aviva-berlin.de/aviv /content_Juedisches%20Leben_Veranstaltungen.php?id=1425308


The shpilkes of punk

Just looking through my old posts and noticed this one has sat in draft form on my computer without actually being visible to your eyes.

ignoblus, for the moment: The shpilkes of punk

I've got lots of similar stuff that I've never posted, mainly because the majority predates this blog.

So, if you'd like to see praise from both Vanity Fair and NPR--not to mention from Neo-Nazis and Islamic extremists--just say and I'll include it. But be forewarned: the Neo-Nazis and Islamic extremists also often condemn me. Go figure.


It was the best of times, it was the worst of times

Hi there Jew-Punk People,

So it's been an odd week. On the upside, papers from the NYTimes to the Forward to Haaretz in Israel have been talking up "Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's." On the less than upside, however, there has been buzzing in the usual crank corners from Neo-Nazis, anti-Zionists and whoever else it is that hates Jews these days. I'll include a couple of links below, but before I do, one last good thing. Seems I'm going to be reading at The Book Cellar in Chicago on Thursday, August 20. Anyone in the Great Lakes region, or anyone at all who feels like chartering a Lear jet for the day, should head on out there and see me do my Heebie-Jeebies-Thang. Ok, here's the link for the reading, followed by a couple of others:






You never call, you never write

I've noticed something odd about blogging. Though you type your little fingers to the bone and spit out posts like valentines to the many, often it's like doing so beneath a bell jar. The echoing of your own heart beating in anticipation of replies is deafening, yet those replies often go the way of messages in a bottle. In other words, they're out there, they're not out there, who can say. It's all mystery and silence and the great question mark in the sky. Does anyone read this thing? If so, do they enjoy it? If not, would they bother to tell me this? And whatever the answer, should I just stop it and spend my time on more productive matters, like, say, cleaning out my refrigerator crisper?

No, I say! Never!! And not just because my crisper frightens me to no end (what in god's name is that fuzzy substance surrounding that vegetable matter?) I won't stop because to do so would be wrong. You are my virtual friends (as opposed to my "real" ones in the "real world".) You are the eyes and ears of Jew-Punk Ascendant. And I refuse to let you down. After all, what else would I do with my nervous fingers, these playthings of the devil? Best to write. And type. And scribble. It keeps me off the streets and in the coffee shops. And as a result it has the extra benefit of keeping my fish-belly-white skin snowy and fresh. No melanomas for me, no sirree.

Ok, enough of that. Just wanted to shout out a bit of guilt at ya. I'm sure that you can take it!

Oh, wait, one last thing. Turns out The Heebie-Jeebies... has been spotted yet again in Israel. This time in the more liberal of the two major papers. Check it out at the following link.


Till next time, Shalom Ya'll,



Sacha Baron Cohen, Tina Fey and "The Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's"

Hi Everyone,

Big news.

First, I would like to announce that production is imminent on a documentary based on "The Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's." Can't say anymore for now, but stay tuned for updates.

Second, also imminent is a feature film starring Sacha Baron Cohen as a Jewish Punk Rocker. "The Adventures of Curly Oxide and Vic Thrill" is written by Tina Fey (!!!) and has a tentative release date of 2011.

I guess the only question now is which film will get the Oscar in the Jewish Punk category. And the envelope, please...



Punk Rock's Secret, Semitic History -- Forward.com

Never mind the garbled look of the link below, it works.

Punk Rock’s Secret, Semitic History – Forward.com

Shared via AddThis


Jew-Punk Anschluss

From the Ministry of Propaganda:

The Jew-Punk armies are continuing their march over greater Germania.

This weekend, Doris Akrap--translator of "The Heebie-Jeebies at CBGB's"--will be reading from "Die Heebie Jeebies im CBGB's" at the Left Book Festival in Berlin.

And, last March, Frau Akrap did the same at the Underground Library in Vienna.

Clearly, the hills are alive with the sound of Jew-Punk. And tomorrow belongs to us!


America Looks Up, Goes "Ahhhh"

That's right, the Fourth of July brought us the usual fiery display, all spiderwebbery skeins of sparkle glory.

Being the proud American that I am, I found a seat on Mass Ave, propped a Jameson's on my knee and proceeded to make yummy noises along with the assembled crowd.

"Ewwww," I went, as the kids behind me sang Neil Diamond (ironically, of course.)

"Ahhhhh," I continued, as the five-year-olds in front ran wild beneath their parents eyes.

"Ohhhhh," we all sighed as the final display kicked out the jams, reds, whites and blues mixing with oranges, yellows and greens that were meant to look jewel-like, but were more Starburst (the candy) seeming than anything.

Still, hard to look down on a sky filled with fire, man-made or otherwise.

Now if only we could get rid of that horrid anthem! "America the Beautiful," anyone?

p.s. Votes also accepted for "This Land is Your Land."


Sign of the Apocalypse

Alert the neighbors!

Call the folks!!

Wake the dog!!!

A hot gaseous orb has appeared in the skies of Boston!

Be afraid, be very afraid.


Cannonball Heard Round the World

Can I just state for the record how much I love The Breeders song "Cannonball"


Vive la revolution!